A god Worth Worshiping?

Imagine that a team of aliens from millions of lightyears away stopped on Earth as part of a research project they were conducting. They are technologically brilliant, friendly, and mean no harm to Earthlings. Observing our way of life is their only mission.

During this time, they create a daily diary for everyone in the country, over a period of an earth year. (Let’s assume the year was 2019, as the sign at the edge of the Milky Way in 2020 would read: Earth - closed in 2020. Please come back later.)

One of their goals is to determine if we had a unified operating theme, not including basic body composition and functions. That is, what does this country of about 330 million have completely in common?

Now, think to yourself, would it be an extensive list?

My list:

1) Americans are born and eventually they die. I am not a scientist but am sure this holds true for all non-Americans too.

2) Physiological needs are critical as we all eat and drink, or we die.

3) ?

Since I cannot produce a third item, I tried to come up with the next closest commonality.

My instinct was to default to popular, overarching themes. Faith entered my mind first. Millions of Americans, as well as myself, feel they answer to a higher power. But there is a lengthy list of religions, each believing that their way is the right way, or that their god is THE God. For some, neither God nor religion are part of their lives. To an alien, this would not suggest unification.

Love, for certain, but unfortunately, there is also much hate. Politics? Ugh. Enjoyment of nature, technology, or sports? For many but not for all. Music, art, literature? Also, a massive variety there.

After some thought, I realized what aliens would find as obvious. Something to which we are clearly subservient. Something all-powerful and all around us. Something whose origin is impossible to understand but whose mechanics are quite simple. For most, it clearly controls our lives.

Its method of communicating is often within sight in several places. This god has countless disciples everywhere, composed only of faces and hands, in small and large numbers.

So, what or who wields this kind of power?

It is the god of Time. We know its disciples as clocks.

We truly do not understand this invisible god of Time. We fear running out of it, but do not know what to do if we have too much of it. Either way, we all answer it.

The aliens would deduce that the Time god instructs the clocks what to communicate. This message must be essential because Americans have these instruments everywhere. On their walls and tables at home and work. In their cars. On lit signs and buildings. This information is so precious they adorn their wrists with them. It is usually the first thing they see when looking at their cellular communication devices and is visible on their computers, items that occupy a great portion of their lives.

Their report would show that Americans observe their time messaging pieces about as often as they eat, drink, reproduce, bathe, and pray. Combined.

This god of Time is dominant, and Americans react accordingly.

The Time communicators instruct them when to sleep and when to wake, when to eat, how long the food should be cooked, when they should or should not drink, when to take medicine, when to leave the house, and when to return. Same for the workplace.

It reminds them when to turn on the television, when to talk with other people, and when to stop. If they lose track of it, panic sets in because Time demands that they should be doing something else, possibly somewhere else.

Even while participating in sporting activities, their report would show, the master clock often controls the duration of the game, from the professional level to youth, somehow signaling when the players and spectators should leave the arena.

This Time god can be tricky, though, as our acquaintances from outer space observe.

The concept of time is measured as constant, but depending on the situation, appears to be malleable. For instance, waiting in line at the DMV for three hours may seem to take forever but the equal period spent relaxing on a beach passes too quickly.

On a smaller scale, a minute and a half might seem like a scant amount of time to do anything, unless holding one’s breath. But many would pay a king’s ransom to take that same ninety seconds to spend it with a dearly missed loved one that has died.

Would the aliens conclude that we put faith into a god that is nothing more than a human-made measurement, with stressful deadlines that often creates unhappiness? Maybe so. But we dare not question this god of Time, for the face of a clock is always staring straight at us. It may whisper only, “tick tock”, but we will hear it. And we will respond.

This column originally appeared in the Times, a Shaw publication.